Behave or else -
Bryan storms off.

(prev) In the dwindling minutes before the wedding, I had what turned out to be a monster miscommunication with my daughter. If you'll remember we're shy a witness to sign the registry (due to last minute wrangling of the wedding party). I had forgotten completely. Sue had only remembered while she was outside in the Chapel parking lot and dispatched Amy (also biding her time as part of the wedding party) with instructions for me to round up this essential participant in the ceremony. "Dad!" Amy whispered from the Chapel doorway "We have an emergency!" Then, she told me what I believed was "Sue wants you to ask Bryan to sign the wedding book" when it was actually Ian - Sue's cousin - that I was supposed to ask (big whoops). Before I could clarify what seemed to me (considering the circumstances) a bizzare request, Amy had rushed off to take her place beside Sue. This led to a simple misunderstanding turning into erroneous assumptions about Bryan's attitude and what had transpired in the parking lot. In the nanosecond I had to process the information I believed Amy had passed on, I put the request down to Bryan having made up with Sue upon his arrival. He must have then offered to do whatever it took to make his sister's day go well (while this is generally a 'reasonable' expection, I'll now admit it was a tad optimistic).

Personally, and considering Bryan's antics, I wasn't entirely thrilled about this turn of events, but I had agreed with Sue earlier that we wouldn't, in the 'spirit of the day', hold any grudges against her brother. And as a wedding is traditionally considered the 'bride's day', who was I to question her judgement? All of this (horror of horrors) resulted in Bryan being asked, mistakenly, to sign the registry (where I come from - an honor). With a snarl he refused, hostility dripping from the monosyllabic grunt he managed to utter. I was taken aback - I believe my responding comment was along the lines of a startled "huh?" - and even more so when he then told me repeatedly to "back off!" and "drop it!". Realizing that he had brought whatever baggage he had along with him to our wedding, whatever patience I had left for this asshat evaporated, and I told him quietly (leaning over to whisper in his ear actually) that if he made a scene, he risked grievous bodily harm. (Apparently my threat is a point of contention - and will serve as irony warning #1. You'll have to check out the phone message for the pay-off). He lept up, and with a ballsy - "I'm outta here - nobody's talking to me that way" left the Chapel, waving Sue off as he stormed across the parking lot. Fair enough. He didn't want to be there. We didn't want him there.

Should have been the end of it. And luckily enough, any conflict (inside the Chapel anyway) was contained to the participants only. Guests (and the Vicar) were blissfully unaware that anything had transpired. Until... Next: Beth freaks out