Bryan gets disinvited.
Shows up anyway.

(prev) Obviously, that wasn't to be. Without a direct confrontation with Bryan, there was no way for us to count on his attendance (or lack thereof) as part of the wedding party. Hell, without any acknowledgment or even a simple RSVP, we didn't even know if he would attend the wedding at all. Increasingly frustrated with her brother's behavior (and Sue's upset at same), I offered to step in, but Sue asked that I remain uninvolved. Always the pragmatist, she believed that if Bryan wanted to be troublesome, so be it. Besides, if Bryan was being so disagreeable, did we really want him standing for us, regardless of what the issue may, or may not have been? Accordingly, and with Bryan's continuing refusal to even talk to Sue, we had to change plans at the last minute to that of only having Amy & Matthew 'stand' for us at the ceremony. Sue's mother's reaction to this was to complain bitterly that nobody from the McGuire side (specifically, Beth) had a 'starring' role in the wedding. Sue, always trying to 'keep the peace', and as a conciliatory gesture, then asked Beth to sign the wedding registry as a witness - a fairly important role and one that I have been raised to believe is an honor. (This change of plans left us 'short' a witness - two are required and the kids were under 18, the minimum age. This 'missing' witness issue was something that would return to haunt us at the service itself). Anyway, when Bryan's antics continued (and worsened), he was subsequently disinvited, by Sue, from the wedding completely. If he wasn't planning to come - fine. Sue had been told by her mother "not to count on your brother coming" in a discussion that centered on Bryan's refusal to talk to Sue, and more specifically - whether he was coming to the wedding or not. If he was coming - Bryan wasn't to bother. And as Bryan was refusing to talk to Sue, she had no alternative but to leave this message with her parents, with whom Bryan still lives, to relay. Always the hothead, I wanted to take sterner measures (he had sent Sue home in tears on numerous occasions and I was becoming increasingly furious) but ultimately agreed with Sue, once again, that Bryan was not worth the aggravation. We'd ignore his actions completely. And as our wedding was only a few days away, we both considered the matter of Bryan's participation 'closed' - Sue's brother would not be attending.

You can imagine our surprise when. despite all of this, Bryan decided to simply show up. During a cell-phone call an hour before the service, Beth informed us of his attendance (Beth and Bryan, both dateless, were traveling together). When questioned, Beth stated, quite matter-of-factly, that "Of course Bryan is coming!" - a rather strange summation of Bryan's attendance, considering his recent antics and that he had been 'disinvited' by the bride herself. We'd also been told "not to count on (Bryan) coming". Despite all of this, Sue and I agreed that we wouldn't make an issue of Bryan's earlier, and what I still consider disgraceful, treatment of his sister. In the 'spirit of the day', we'd put any hostility aside and concentrate on making the day a pleasant one for all concerned - including Bryan. Sue and I both believed that a wedding day is not the time for such hostilities and obviously, we expected the same from him. Alas, wasn't to be. He showed up dressed in khaki slacks and an open-collar golf shirt, despite the fact that the wedding was formal - everyone else was dressed in suit and tie (not itself a terribly big deal, but in retrospect spoke volumes about his true attitude towards Sue's 'day'). He refused to talk to anyone (apparently, as we were told later by the MIL, his stated plan all along). Upon arriving at the Chapel parking lot, Bryan gave Sue - his sister, the bride - the blow-off when she (always the kind heart) attempted to greet him. In fact, Bryan waited, quite deliberately, to establish eye-contact before turning heel and walking away. It's safe to say that Bryan was still a snarly SOB and planned to stay that way throughout the day.

Alas, as I was inside the Chapel, tending to last-minute preparations (including a wonky sound system that refused to work), I wasn't aware of any of this until after the service. Unfortunately, there was no way of me knowing that Bryan was still behaving as he had in the weeks previous. I had also assumed (as it turns out, wrongly) that if someone comes to a wedding - especially that of his sister - they behave. I labored under that delusion until... Next: Behave or else - Bryan storms off